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large families

Large family movies are sort of a theme, recently. The Cheaper by the Dozen Series. Mine, Yours and Ours. I found the first one amusing. Cummon, who wouldn’t find—“Good job, FedEx!”—who wouldn’t find that funny? But the second one, became a bit routine. And the third was downright ridiculous. I mean seriously. I’m sure everyone knows that big families don’t really have that much drama happening 24/7. Actually, no...you might not know that, because large families are a rarity and you’ve perhaps not seen a large family not operate that way. And even though you are intelligent, gentle reader, the big screen certainly has vivid emotional appeal—one’s brain plays tricks on you—if you see it, you believe it myoticly. So allow me to disagree with the god of this world.

First, allow me to agree with the big screen. Yes, if a parent or parents would raise their 5+ children as though they were all an only child around which the world revolves—yes, one would have a cheaper by the dozen scenario. But, thank God, most parents (and children) of large families figure it out, it’s much more productive and efficient and beautiful, actually—to work in a team, instead of each for the self as is demonstrated quite well in the mentioned films. A large brood of children, having experienced mutuality and daily life as a common goal toward a common purpose, is a distinctly powerful force in society—unless one enjoys extreme individualism. And we all do by virtue of the fact that we’re willingly and unwillingly subjected to the propaganda.

May I just say that I am grateful for the skills and experience that have been bestowed upon me by virtue of being a part of a family of 10. Do you have any idea how quickly a family of 10 can prepare food, set the table, eat, clear the table and wash the dishes. It’s beautiful and works like a well oiled machine. Over the past two holidays, I sat back and enjoyed the production, while at my post making the mashed potatoes. Sister 5 is setting the table while brother 4 is following her drippling silverware in their general spot around a large table, while playfighting with her incessantly. Mom heaps the food into bowls that magically appear on the counter, as I notice she is ready for them and find them in the cupboard above me. Sister 4 reaches for a spoon and sister 5 magically understands what she is reaching for and places it in her hand.

I wish my district meetings would work as smoothly. I wish I could organize work projects where at least half the people that showed up would have a sense of personal identity and their unique role toward the end goal. Cheaper by the Dozen, very humorously and very erroneously portrays every child is a rescue mission, an accident waiting to happen, a power out for him/herself and an unquenchable force working against the peace and harmony of the whole. Catastrophes do happen in large families. However, it is my distinct belief that just as many catastrophes happen in smaller families because in the large families each individual subconsciously monitors the health of the family system (the health of the individual depends upon it) and calculates the effect their contribution to an upheaval might bring to the family system. Smaller families have a larger allotted catastrophe contribution quota per capita.

house not in order--the marriage supper approaches--Judas stands outside

We were preparing for the wedding. My friend came over to my house to shower and ready herself for the big day. My hasty preparations for the wedding guests that were to stay at my house was obvious. Gremlin-like creatures littered the yard and had been through the entire house leaving it in disarray. They had been through my drawers and cubbies, pulling things out of place and delightfully destroying my organization with glee. The oven was sitting on top of the shower. Other furniture was oddly askew. In my haste, I had shoved things into closets and contained the mess as much as possible. But my friend was not fooled, “your house is a mess” she said, “You aren’t ready for the wedding nor for hosting guests.”

Outside in the yard my friend encountered larger gremlins and a relative smoking on the porch. Two large gremlins were tossing a ball back and forth to each other in the yard. One was dressed in black and the other in white. A small airplane lay on the sidewalk. My friend opted to play catch with them and threw the toy airplane to one of them. One of the gremlins caught it and threw it back with great force and a bit of temper. The toy plane grew twice the size and nearly wiped her out. She decided it wasn’t a good idea to play with this pair. But she watched with interest as the pair became enamored with the activities occurring in the house. They looked on with great interest and followed the owners every move as though mesmerized. Furthermore, it was easy to spy on this house because the walls were transparent and one whole wall was entirely missing. Yet despite their preference toward the home and its owner, they were inexplicably controlled by a stronger evil power, which periodically demanded of them, incriminating evidence against the house. They were powerless to resist divulging information even though they wished to be faithful guests.

when friends die

the beginning of the end
when silence breaks into pure spirit
Eternity waits on the Omega
Disbanding friend from friend
Hands ripped apart
Beating hearts torn out

This bloody sacrificial rite

Oh, devil, could you not spare me one
Satan, you consume even the children’s plate and fork
You take what is most precious
Ill will and evil deeds behind precious faces
Thy love of friend turns them into black spaces

What greed has not swallowed into nothingness
What terrors have not turned hearts aside
Death then slowly steals this one
It came but last night to disappear one most precious

Your methods are shameless
You taunt us all with your slow smile
You rot bloody hearts in their bodies
We thwart your designs and put in one new

But you, oh death, demand this one too

beating hearts hand in hand
friend to friend—who can disband?
Oh, the wait is an eternity
Spirit to spirit, till the silence breaks
When the end will be the beginning

SMBI Critique

As a whole, I was rather impressed with the quality of education at SMBI. The material I encountered while there was at the level of any college theology course. And folks did make a valiant attempt at anabaptizing the protestant theology they worked off of. In speaking to the administrator and a teacher, their sentiment was notably the same as two of my readers Arthur and Javan—we need more Anabaptist writers of theology out there. The administrator pointed at me. “Who? Me?” I cried in protest. “Yeah, you,” he said. That just seems really weird coming from a place where women don’t physically step into the pulpit to address the congregation. Well, to do so figuratively would make it so much more okay, don’t you know.

I attended a class in Theology I and Urban Missions as well as chapel, where the topic addressed the concept of “imputed righteousness and justification,”—God declares a sinner a saint. Anabaptists have much trouble stopping there, as was evident in this chapel. The speaker then contrasted the mentioned aspect of the salvation event with an added element necessary for the completion and working out of one’s salvation. Glassenheit: an Anabaptist word that means abandonment of one’s self that leads to peace and calm, the surrendering of one’s self to the kingdom of God and to the community of believers. It means a life now lived in on-going discipleship and living out the indwelling of Christ. It wasn’t directly stated but the implications are that one is not Christian unless he/she enters into glassenheit.

The class on Doctrine of God presented the attributes of God which were organized contextually into absolute and relative attributes—relative/relational, referring to the more personable character of God. Time and space (eternity, immensity), creative (omnipresence, omniscience, omnipotence) and moral attributes (faithfulness, justice, goodness). The absolute attributes involved God’s attributes of infinity and perfection—perfection in truth, love and holiness. I found the presentation and the categories to be quite cleaver. It avoided some of the complications of misapplication of distinct attributes. God is perfect in love, truth and holiness, not perfect in a static unchangeable manner. The categories leave room for process theology.

As for the sources for this particular presentation—I asked and I was told—these are notes handed down from the previous administrator. There doesn’t seem to be much of an inclination to cite the sources nor for any particular author or thinker to claim his/her work particularly.

The Urban Evangelism class I found most unusual. Each student was to present a short book report on a book they had chosen to read—all of the books were written by mainstream Protestants, such as Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire by Cymbala. There were numerous others. The class and the teacher then reflected on the presented information. It became obvious to me that the categories used in the book were entirely missed by the students because the students obviously had no experience or context from which to understand the categories presented within its own context. Yet they reflected upon the information presented from their own context. That was weird. It was like being bilingual and listening to a speaker speak in one language and having the translator translate according to literal word use, irregardless of meaning.

As for the average SMBI student—the females were somber, reserved, and very modest (translated as boring and ugly). The young men were studious, mature and intent on finding the ugliest wife, so as not to fall into sin, passion and too much frivolousness. I found such lack of hormonal presence and fun very pious and godly—such as is demonstrated in this clip http://youtube.com/watch?v=XNOkpM43fMA
and as was overheard in “girltalk” time in the dorm the night before. Girltalk time didn’t make it onto YouTube.

how not to be like the Christians

My roommate was raised in a non-practicing Jewish family. Her journey has taken her into traditional evangelicalism and then she decided to explore her Jewish roots and became Messianic. She says that exploring her Jewish roots was the best thing she ever did for herself. I think it’s great having her as a roommate while I’m learning my Hebrew. One of these days I’ll do a Sabbath with her. Yeah! Another culture that does head coverings.

Last week she came home from a study she was doing with her Messianic group and said that a portion of the time was given to a discussion on, how not to be like the Christians. Although I guard myself against establishing a direction and a vision based on becoming that which the other is not—I was immediately interested in what a marginal Christian group’s critique was of the Christian mainstream. Below is the list of the not so Christian practices these Messianic Jews would fault Christians for engaging in.

Holidays—Christians celebrate every holiday anyone else would celebrate. In other words, even the pagan holidays are celebrated in the exact same way the pagans celebrate them. Christians don’t even bother redeeming the day or the celebration of it.

Immodesty—Christians clothe themselves in exactly the same ways as the non-Christian does. No thought is given to the messages that are perpetuated through clothing in our sex selling culture.

Honesty of speech—In Jewish culture it is a mitzvot (a good deed) to speak to a person with clear, frank honesty, whether you or the other finds the truth communicated, difficult. Conversely, Christians sway their speech to suit their purposes. They use flattery and they lie. It was even mentioned in this critique that it is also dishonest to lie with your non-verbals. It was specifically sited that flirting or leading someone on without intent for follow through was dishonest and un-christian behavior that Christians often partake in. Ouch.

Involve the elderly in one’s community—Social tradition to put the elderly into the nursing home once they cannot care for themselves, or be functionally independent. The Christians also do this. The elderly are put away in a place where they cannot contribute to our lives and to our communities. Our mind frames put them in a frame of needing care and comfort, whereas we should put them in a place of wisdom giving for our own needy lives. If they could be of use to us, they would not need to be comforted. Ouch.

a meditation on parable

Jesus’ words “With what can we compare the kingdom of God, or what parable will we use for it? It is like a mustard seed, which when sown upon the ground, is the smallest of all the seeds on earth; yet when it is sown it grows up and becomes the greatest of all shrubs, and puts forth large branches, so that the birds of the air can make nests in its shade.”
With many such parables he spoke the word to them, as they were able to hear it; he did not speak to them except in parables, but he explained everything in private to his disciples.

Have you ever been door-to-door witnessing, street preaching, or done traditional or prescribed sorts of evangelism? While doing this sort of evangelism have you ever felt like you needed to know all the answers and got yourself into a bind debating with a skeptical stranger?

I’ve discovered something almost by accident. When out and about, bumping into unbelievers, I’ve relinquished control. I don’t give answers. I tell interesting stories. I ask weird questions. And I give vague or somewhat mysterious answers. I’ve seen the interest in the other’s eyes pique. Once after only two encounters with an agnostic, he was all but begging me for my testimony. What’s the difference? What if I told you the kingdom of God is like a tree or should I read you the church discipline (parameters for this corner of the kingdom)? Or the kingdom of God is like a guy growing grass seed on his lawn. It’s like the difference between telling someone how great an event is or being sure to tell them (severely) what the entrance fee is.

Jesus didn’t tell the crowds everything. In fact, it is obvious in this passage that he intentionally did not tell the crowds but later explained the details to his disciples.

the simple AAR: deviantly Abby style

Pre-trip arrangements:
Ride to airport. Cost: my running partner insisted on taking me.
Flight from Mpls to Dulles. Cost: $140
Borrowed my sister’s car for commute and travel to and from all locations below. She insisted that I not rent a car. Cost: Dedication to familial oneanothering—mind you, she is my younger sister, which means I was involved in rearing her!
Snacks and water purchased for the week: granola bars, bananas and a six pack of bottled water $8.58

Schedule:
Fri am – Train pass from the Vienna commuter lot. Cost: $10
Fri noon – Talked myself into the last sessions of the ETS for $10
Fri aftnoon – Fought with my computer wireless hook-up at the local Caribou—cost: dead phone battery and $2 drink.
Fri 7-8 pm – Mennonite Scholars and Friends Reception (good food, boring company)
Fri evening – gathering of Bethel students and alumni at local burger joint (great company and recommendations for the days ahead) Cost: 10.39
More train pass and parking fees: $20
Night spent in the car in a parking lot. Temperature: 38 F Slept well. Woke up early.
Sat Breakfast: free at the Renaissance (Starbucks coffee ran like a river from this place—the additional spread was amazing: cereal, soda, pastries, tea, fruit, muffins. I had to refrain from gaping and stuffing my pockets.)
Sat 9-11:30 am Karl Barth Society of North America: debate with Hart on the analogia entis. The Bartian arguements were terrible.
Sat lunch – Lunch buffet at a Lebanese dive. $8 (good company—books and the Arabic chatter of customers)
Sat eve – sister’s going away reception at Mt. View. Great 4 part harmony and my brother gave a short meditation.
Night spent at Mt. View. The bed felt great on an aching body. Cost: my cousin and sister’s service at the nursing home
Sun am – to church with my cousin, brother, sister and sister-in-law at the outreach church in Charlottesville
Sun lunch – at Mt. View Cost: hospitality received/hospitality given
Sun 5-6:30 – Science, Technology and Religion Group: Interpreting Quantum Mechanics—Christian and other perspectives.
Sun eve – crashed numerous receptions—Princeton’s was the most memorable. Bag check: $5
Sun night – rode the subway to the end of the line with new friends going the same direction
Night spent in the car in a different parking lot. Temperature: 35 F
Mon am – sponge bath in the restroom at a very nice suburban mall.
Breakfast: scouting out the free Starbucks and breakfast spread at the Renaissance.
Mon session – Latino Religion, Culture and Society Group: Legacies of Colonization
Mon noon – book hunting
Lunch: Fuddruckers in Chinatown—cost: 12.18
Afternoon and Evening: travel to SMBI with a telephone booth stop to transform minor but significant details into the image of a 5 years younger aspiring SMBI student.
Night spent in the girls dorm at SMBI.
Tues am: breakfast at SMBI—cost: participation in generational line of Amish Mennonite community (thorough knowledge of the Mennonite 5 points of separation game.)
Classes attended: Urban Evangelism and Theology I: Doctrine of God
Lunch at SMBI—cost: more Mennonite connection games with the administrator—score: one degree of separation (my sister taught school with him)
Tues afternoon and eve: Travel to Lancaster. Looked up an old friend in Ephrata. Accepted a dinner invitation with a new friend and his wife, who I met at the conference. They bent over backwards to find a local lady who sold coverings out of her basement. The Mennonite lady opened her shop after-hours for me, so I could fit on coverings and then trusted me to pay her when I discovered I had no means of payment with me. Absolutely amazing! Cost: mutual love, grace, generosity and trust from those in the community of God. (Who would steal coverings anyway?) Oh, and the new friends wanted me to, and I quote him… “meet their son so he could fall in love with me and then I could become their daughter-in-law”—potentially expensive? or an investment of substantial returns?—depends on one’s perspective.

Cost of gas to and from all the above locations and returning home to Minnesota: $103
Total cost of trip not including books purchased or membership fees: $329.15

definitions:
covering—that white thing I wear on my head
ETS--Evangelical Theological Society
AAR—American Academy of Religion
SMBI—Sharon Mennonite Bible Institute
Mt. View—Mt.View Nursing Home, A facility for the aging, staffed entirely by Amish Mennonite youth doing voluntary service or pursuing nursing degrees.

interesting facts about Abby’s AAR adventure

Books purchased at the AAR:
(Listed in order of those I found most exciting to lesser)
The Beauty of the Infinite by David Bentley Hart
Friendship: Interpreting Christian Love by Liz Carmichael
The First Hebrew Primer
Mastering New Testament Greek by Thomas A Robinson (…complete with a personal demonstration of the software tools by the author himself.)
Introducing Radical Orthodoxy by James K A Smith
A Concise History of Christian Thought by Tony Lane

Stupid things done at the AAR:
Got my shoe laces caught at the bottom of an escalator full of people creating a panicked people pile-up on top of me. Embarrassment suffered: 0.

General appearance: lots of black, quasi-business, conservative Mennonite image. No room for the homeless living out-of-the-sack look, although that was sort-of the reality.

Most devious thought:
Wow, someone could go husband hunting here!

P.S. The objective of my AAR adventure posts is not to get people to send money. Rather, it is to demonstrate to myself and others that things can be done differently. Living on the lowest budget possible without abusing hospitality and avoiding appearance of poverty are my intent, as I rubbed elbows with, well, those with fatter wallets (or credit cards) while mingling with conferees as sort of one of them but deviating when outside of their visual scope. I decidedly chose my alternative accommodations, for reasons such as identification with the poor, for personal challenge and purposeful lifestyle deviance.

I look forward to next year. The intellectual climate is addictive! The meetings will be held in San Diego, which means the climate will be amazing. I will be able to hear the crash of the ocean waves all night and breathe ocean air. Perhaps I’ll go on a short retreat to the Mojave Desert again.