Wednesday, August 09, 2006

beachy humor?!!

I think I might have confused some of my readers by claiming Amish Mennonites have a creative sense of humor. A friend pointed out a blob to me the other day which some might find very humorous—others might simply be lost, or just haven’t been blessed with a good sense of humor. We should feel sorry for the latter two categories of folks.

Their lacking can be explained via the following phenomenon:

The particle-like character of their observer’s eye-ball alters the observeds’ behavior in the quantum environment. So, if you don’t see the humor in this here blog, this quantum phenomenon is occurring. One cannot accurately catch both position and momentum of the satire. You see, lipstick, facial piercings and such are so jarring to the Beachy eye (like white legs), that one can no longer emit humor waves. Likewise, wide brimmed hats and pleated aprons have the same effect. Too Amish as well as too liberal, enacts this phenomenon. Yes, I know what you are thinking. This is not a case of the emperor’s new clothes because I am Amish Mennonite and I cannot lie or pretend anything—If I ever did not tell the literal truth, you would see me blushing through my profile picture.

By the way—I don’t know what these young punks are doing using satire. There is no Deutsch wort for satire—it simply doesn’t exist. I’m certain that the only explanation is mutation. These folks are the new mutants—Beachy mutants. Ach schantlich!

And if that all isn’t bad enough—they stole my quote. They stole the quote, where I’m quoting someone’s quote.

Actually, I like "the draft" the best--although I should not say so, because by now that Holiness Beachy Boy has got a swelled head and isn't so holy anymore.


ConMennoLibAmish said...

You think you're confused!?! I'm afraid this poor little Amish boy is confused!! I'm not sure whether to thank you for the compliment or take you thru a ten step logical progression that shows how you are wrong to insult us. :-)

Nonetheless, thanks for spreading the word! =)

Anonymous said...

garsh, anyway about ur last comment, I am afraid the holiness beachy boy's name doesn't stand for a state of mind, it actually refer's to his tie's with the holiness church /cough cough
anyway at the rate beachy's are going they won't be around that much long, there will just be alot of liberal mennonites in florida enjoying their fishing boats and beachfront property and wondering if anyone can tell they are hypocryts(spelling? lol i'm beachy, 8th grade education...) anyway i hope u escape before that monster called "red vehicles, parted hair and covering strings" gets u

espíritu paz said...

Hey, I've got a new project idea for you all. You should do a movie that plays the English lust for drama and entertainment off the Beachy Amish peculiarity. You could call it A-men, after our dear forfather, God rest his soul, and take us through the not so daily life of the Beachy Amish mutant--X-men style. Yes, I know you're supposed to pretend not to know who or what the X-men are but I know you've been slipping off to the movies or the video store.